Haih.

Find that i kinda dislike my dad these few days.
He keep smoking. I really feel very uncomfortable.
Especially when i was sick.

He keep on saying my fever small matter only. ==
He don't know that i was suffering. Go and smoke some more.
I eat panadols he scolded me: "You thought is sweets?"
Of course i won't la. I follow instructions only.
2 caplets every 4 to 6 hours.
If he really care about my health the he shouldn't smoke in the house.

1st January 2012

Yesterday overnight at friend's house after performance.

Left my phone at home before go out. This afternoon only got back my phone.

This morning i ate a little for brunch.

Decided to watch movie with my friends at jusco.

But after brunch i vomited. Was having headache.

LOL. But the plan still goes on.

Watched 23:59. Haha.

When i bought the tickets i didn't realize that it's PG18.

When i was going in. The man suddenly called me and asked for my IC.

I was like "huh?" then lend him my IC.

Then he suddenly say i cannot enter. I was like "WTF??" LOL

I said "why?" he said "i'm not 18 yet"

OMG. what to do? hahaha.

We were discussing to change tickets to another movie.

But the man said cannot. Then we tried to beg him.

Cause the girl at the counter didn't tell me must be 18 above.

Finally he let me enter. LOL. Lucky?

After movie we walked around.

He told me he's at jusco too.

Wanted to see him actually. But i scare. Haha. Scare awkward.

Suddenly, he was standing in front of me when i walked out from popular.

At that moment, i had a sudden heart attack. LOL

Seriously, my heart almost jumped out.

Quite nervous and awkward.

Ya. We smiled to each other. Then he walked away.

Very soon, i saw him again for the 2nd time.

He just passed beside me. With his mum.

But we did not have a chance to talk.

Even if we had, i don't think i could speak it out.

Kayang said we yao yuen. But i said 有缘无分。Haha. Truth.

After wandering around, followed my friend's car to her grandmother's house.

We had barbecue at there. Hmm. It's fun. But i didn't really enjoy it.

Haha. Maybe because it's not with my own family and relatives?

First time without using knife, i used hand and fork to eat a lamb chop. Haha

Tomorrow although school haven't start yet, but tuition already started,

At first i wanted to change to Tuesday because i don't wanna see him on Monday.

But now I'm feeling better. Telling myself that i shouldn't avoid.

Haha. Actually it's not a big matter right? Why do i take it so hard?

The same words again. "I need time"

Although i do smile and laugh a bit these few days,

but my heart still very 沉重(heavy)。

For me, it's just a New Year. Not a New Life.

Things still remain. I am still me. The forever emo and cool me. Haha

Photo taken at Jusco.

Another new year.

It's another new year.
It passed so fast. Fast until i can't believe it's 2012 now.
Seriously, i'm not really ready for 2012 yet.
One is because of him. Another reason is because of study.
This year form 5 already. I guess i'll busy like hell.
Not because of society. Tuitions also can make me drown already. LOL. And my job too.

Don't know why i will start blogging these few days.
Affected by someone? LOL. Or maybe i'm just too down and sad.
No one i could talk to. Sometimes even if you tell your best friends about your problems.
They might give you some advices. But the final conclusion still depends on yourself.
You can only rely on your own.

Of course, i already get used to this kind of living style.
I don't simply trust people. If i trust you, you're lucky. LOL. just kidding.
Even sometimes when my friends praise me, i'll consider about it first.
Thinking whether it's true or not. Two face people i saw a lot.
If you want to be like this, i can treat you in the same way too. =)


Telling myself that i'm okay. I really think i'm okay.
But today my dance friend ask me what happened.
What i surprised is i start tearing before i finish my words to her.
I really hope i can stop crying. Don't wish my eyes to be swelled when school reopen.
I'm really tired. I need some time to calm my mind.
I took half a year to let go of my ex. How long do i need to let go of you?
Haha. More than that? Less than? Or never?
It's a probability. =)